The True (G)entleman

4. A month/year of your life when you were the happiest and why.

Senior year of high school. Cause it was awesome.

3. A time you’d rather forget

All the times when I was a little kid and would cry if my parents took a game or turned it off before I could save.

I still say the 8 year old wrath that I unleashed upon my parents time and time again was totally justified. Losing an hour or more of game play because you couldn’t play 5 more minutes to get to a save sucks. An hour of my life gone. Also having to redo it over and over ruins the game a little bit more every time. Speaking of games and 3s I’m gonna go play some Fable III.

about that party was the Brazilian kid who dressed like Uncle Sam and got suuuuuper fucked up. The last thing he ate was lunch at like 10 or 11AM and he drank an entire bottle of Jim Beam AFTER he was already drunk. Stumbled around screaming MMMMERICA!!!!!!

2. Something you’re self-conscious about.

Everything.

I’m conscious of every little thing I do and I’m constantly comparing myself to other people. Not because I want to, but because I can’t help it. My brain never shuts off or slows down. When you compare yourself to other people all the time you realize that there’s always somebody better than you at everything you do. You also realize that there’s always somebody worse. Usually the same person will be better at some things and worse at others, that’s just logical. Over time though I’ve gotten over feeling bad about noticing that people are better than me at something. Just because they’re better doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it, if you work harder and smarter than they do their natural skill won’t mean shit. Lets look at something obscure and nerdy for example, web comics. One of the most successful web comic producers is Ryan Sommer. His first comic was and is called Least I could do which is about a guy who has lots of sex and does funny stuff. If you look at it now and then go look at the first comics you’ll notice the art is different. That’s because he did the first ones himself, then (if you believe the comics) hired a homeless artist outside his apartment building to draw all of his comics. He doesn’t do his own drawing because he knows there’s somebody better than him at it and he accepts that enough to work together with him. Now he has that comic still going very strong, a fantasy comic that started out making fun of fantasy books but has sort of turned into it’s own epic story, and one making fun of how…demographic based comics have become. The point is, he’s a shitty artist but he makes a living from something that requires art work because he realized that somebody was better than him. Rather than quitting he got that person to work with him and it benefited both of them in the long run.

The whole reason I’m so quiet is because the filter in my mind that controls what I do and don’t say has so many layers that unless something is perfect it takes too long to be accepted. By that time it’s too late and the “It’s been too long now it’s just stupid” filter kicks in and kills the idea.

I’m too skinny, and I can’t gain weight even when I try. I did gain some muscle but it hardly makes a difference.

Something about my face, I alternate between thinking my face is weird to thinking my face is sexy as hell.

My fingernails, I chew them all the time…and the fingers attached to them to the point where it causes constant pain but that’s not enough to get me to stop.

My dick, bigger than a bridge.

All of my posts anywhere.

My comics, the art, the jokes, etc. the jokes seem awesome for a few months then I hate em even if other people tell me they love em.

Many other things, but I have to run off to my psych class now. There’s a pretty girl I sit next to that I talk to every day after class now because I just said fuck it and started talking to her one day. It’s that simple.

not in the head but like…in the leg or something like that.

Yes that was awesome, but you should really look at number 21 with South Dakota in the first box and China in the second one.

for day 1 of the challenge was longer than the post with the list for the challenge.

Jesus. Fucking. Christ.

1. How you’re different on Tumblr to how you are in real life.

On Tumblr I’m either really real or really fake. I don’t know why that is but I’d like to always be really real and get rid of the fake shit. Think less of me now that you know that I don’t post who I am, but that’s not how I see it. As I see it I’ve been posting who I would be if I said and did everything that popped into my mind rather than who I actually am. You’re getting to know my brain, not my body.

In real life I’m not that way at all; in real life I’m as much in the middle as you can possibly get. Politically I’m an independent, which basically means I vote for the candidate rather than the party…that is if I pay attention to the candidates. I’m not gonna vote if I don’t know anything about who’s running, if I do that I might as well just flip a coin and pick the candidate that turns me on the most. I’m also a centrist, which means I’m right in-between the liberals and the conservatives. I like to seem rational, but nobody who’s rational gets any real support. It’s the people who say crazy shit who get on the news. The people who offer legitimate simple to understand solutions have their ideas circulate only in underground communities on the internet.

People (meaning women) don’t like people who are rational all the time and make the right decisions all the time and keep their cool all the time. Because of this I’ve mastered the art of acting like I’m interesting, a professional poser if you will. I have friends of every kind and none of them see me as not belonging (as far as I know). I have gamer friends who just stay inside all day and have little to no social life (I know a girl who’s a freshman in college who has never had a boyfriend by choice). I have stoner friends (who doesn’t?). I have friends who joined the military. I have friends who want to be CEOs of companies and powerful politicians. I have friends who are happy with just getting whatever job they can, working it until they get bored of it, travel around and have fun until they run out of money, and then repeat until they die (which really doesn’t sound that awful as long as you don’t take out stupid loans or do anything else that’s stupid). I have friends who’s entire lives revolve around being social and selling what they sell because of their personality rather than what they’re selling.The point is, I can blend in and enjoy myself like a motherfucker. I still don’t consider it being fake and I only use the term ‘professional poser’ to poke fun at myself. Although I’m being many different types of people, this IS who I am. I love it. The thing I love to do is to see people do what they love to do, and there are people who do that in every station of life. I hope to do breaking research in Social Psychology some day, and to do that best I want to eliminate bias. I hope that I can do that by getting to know and becoming a part of many different groups of people. Except douche bags, those people are total douche bags.

…YOU SEE! THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I FEEL LAZY!

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Really I think I’ve just been trying to sort out why I do what I do using this little box on my glowing rectangle. I hope you haven’t been too annoyed by all of this and I’ll understand if you reply with a tldr. It feels great to write like this even if I didn’t manage to keep on topic the whole time AND GOD DAMMIT I’M DOING IT AGAIN.

End post.

I decided to do a 30 day challenge because of peer pressure; and by peer pressure I mean seeing other people post awesome stuff on it. Although I have fun with pretty much everything I do, everything I post with this will be true. Don’t really care if you don’t care, I wanna do it.

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1. How you’re different on Tumblr to how you are in real life.
2. Something you’re self-conscious about.
3. A time you’d rather forget
4. A month/year of your life when you were the happiest and why.
5. Your favorite 10 people right now and why.
6. Your least favorite 5 people right nw and why.
7. Something you’re really scared of and why.
8. Your most “what the fuck was I thinking?” ex.
9. Something you like that most people hate/something you hate that most people like.
10. A time you were in the wrong/treated someone badly.
11. A friend you’ve lost that you’re better off without/one you wish you had back.
12. Youre opinion on your own weight and what classes as “too fat” and “too thin”
13. A person you wished lived closer and why.
14. Something that makes you really fucking angry.
15. 5 things you’re looking forward to.
16. List how many people you’ve dated, kissed, and done “stuff” with.
17. Something that’s been on your mind a lot lately.
18. 5 favorite girl names, 5 favorite boy names.
19. What you’d do if you were invisible for a day.
20. Your opinion on cheating on people.
21. A date you’d love someone to take you on.
22. The subjects you’re studying and why/your job and what you think of it.
23. Something you’re dreading in the next month.
24. A bit about your social life outside of Tumblr.
25. Youre worst “look” that you thought was cool at the time.
26. Whether you’d rather marry someone who’s rich but ugly, or poor but attractive.
27. Someone who really hurt you.
28. Your horoscope for today and whether you think it’s accurate.
29. A picture that comes up when you type your name into Google.
30. A picture of yourself taken today!

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I’ll post the first one in a bit, feeling pretty lazy today.

that it is more satisfying to be a good person because you want to be a good person than because god tells you to.

I don’t remember where I saw this or who said it, but it’s one of the few quotes that’s stuck with me. When you realize that all of us have had thousands of quotes thrown at us since the day we were born you can look at the ones that you really remember. Those ones are the ones that define who you are as a person in this world. They probably reflect many of your core values broken down into the simplest, yet most powerful, way to put them. Think about what your favorite quotes are even if you can’t remember where they came from and if you feel that I’m right I’d love to know what quotes have stuck with you and affected your life.